Draco's thoughts after he joins Voldemort, sung to the tune of Amish Paradise.

Another random song parody because I'm stuck at home sick.

The most random alternate ending for the Harry Potter series ever!

Yet another one from me....

Here's another alternate ending for DH...please R&R!

Billy Mays hosts the most important infomercial of his life.

A disturbing dream forces Tom Riddle to confront one of his deepest fears.

Peter Pettigrew orders a cheeseburger...but there are problems. Will he ever get his cheeseburger?

Tom's thoughts as he stands at his mother's grave.

Lucius is in Azkaban. Draco and Narcissa are chronically depressed, so Bellatrix decides to cheer them up. Chocolate chip cookies make everyone happy. Right?

Tom Riddle has an Ebenezer Scrooge experience.

He owns you. What happened to Draco after Potter escaped Malfoy Manor. Takes place during Defiance and True Colors, but is canon compliant. Rated for torture.

The Second War is over, Voldemort aka Phil is dead, and the wizarding world is in shambles. What are Harry and his friends to do? Blog about it, of course! Sequel to The Hogwarts Blog. Again, moderately AU.

Regulus writes a rude note to Voldemort...and starts a trend.

Asteria drilled him with a stare. "Either he's in or he's out, Neville. If we want Malfoy as our ally, we'll have to treat him like one." Slight AU. Companion piece to Defiance.

A boy and his uncle say goodbye...and more besides. Crackfic.

When James Potter and Sirius Black discover a secret notebook that allows Slytherins to communicate, all hell breaks loose. A Marauder Era Blog-type story.

Draco Malfoy was the first to discover the Fanfic Writers--and their startling power to alter his reality. He was not the last.

Are you a wizard who has to drive a car? Do you have no idea what you're doing when you get behind the wheel? Well, you just sit right down and let Rodolphus Lestrange's Guide to Driving put your mind at ease!

Seven word profiles of Harry Potter characters. Not tragic. Not profound. Maybe not even coherent. Share and Enjoy.