R

Right What Is Wrong

  • Idea Repository

    A place to stash ideas I don't have the time or motivation to pursue, in case anyone wants to adopt them.

  • The Dark Lord's Not Dead! He's Resting!

    In the depths of Azkaban, Sirius taunts Bellatrix over her faith in her Lord's survival. She doesn't quite get the joke. (Monty Python ripoff: Dead Parrot!Voldemort. Oneshot.)

  • Saved by the Goblins

    The goblins of Gringotts dispose of a nasty little artifact discovered in a certain vault. Oh, and the rest of the soul attached to it, too. [Crackfic. Oneshot.]

  • Saved By The Boggart

    [AU] Boggarts behave a little differently than in canon, and matters go south very quickly for a certain treacherous rodent. [Oneshot.]

  • Harry Potter And The Cursed Plotline

    Harry gets ambushed by two unfamiliar boys with oddly familiar faces and learns some very strange things. [Oneshot. Crackfic. Time travel. Albus-bashing (NOT Dumbledore-bashing). Not for "Cursed Child" fans.]

  • Contracts Gone Wild

    Abuse of magical contracts for fun and profit. [Oneshot. Crack.]

  • Force Interrupt

    In which canon scenes are interrupted, and matters progress... in an alternate manner. In this chapter: Bathilda Bagshot, or rather, "Bathilda Bagshot".

  • Sirius Saves Himself

    It's amazing how much writing a politely-worded letter can get you. [Oneshot.]

  • Expellitournamentus!

    Supposedly, the Disarming Charm is Harry's signature spell. So what if he used it to take on the Triwizard Tournament? [Oneshot. Pure crackfic.]

  • Weaseling Past The Age Line

    The Weasley Twins point out the insufficiency of the Age Line, and a few other things. [Oneshot. Crackfic.]

  • The Gods Themselves Cannot Recall Their Gifts

    [AU] Upon his bodily dissolution on October 31, 1981, Voldemort discovers that his Horcruxes do, indeed, anchor him to immortality. In fact, they anchor him all too well. Oneshot.

  • Harry Potter And The Very Quickly Resolved Plot

    /Crack, oneshot/ There are worse things in the world than death. They're just as effective, too.

  • Armando Dippet And The Two Brain Cells To Rub Together

    /AU, oneshot/ Tom Riddle reports on his capture of the Heir of Slytherin. The Headmaster is not amused.

  • Greedy Ron And The Three Seconds Of Thinking Ahead

    It's that fanfiction plot again: Ron's been bribed by Dumbledore to pretend to befriend Harry and keep him down! Only... Ron's given this situation a bit of thought... /oneshot, Dumbledore-bashing, mild Ron-bashing, parody/

  • The Goblet of Fire and The Not Terribly Uncommon Charm

    /AU, crack, oneshot/ Suppose the Goblet of Fire really had been vulnerable to the Confundus Charm...

  • Hallowed Horror

    After the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry takes a moment to really think about the Deathly Hallows.

  • An Anticlimatic Tournament

    Slicing the Gordian Knot, Hogwarts-style. /oneshot, Intelligent!Harry/

  • Miscommunication Is Wonderful

    During the war with Voldemort, several witches and wizards independently come to a single conclusion: Voldemort has a Horcrux that must be destroyed. Luckily, each of them are thinking about a different one. Oneshot.

  • Your Patronus Is What?

    So Snape's Patronus is a doe because he's in love with Lily, whose Patronus is a doe because she's in love with James, whose Patronus is a stag... Er, wait a moment, what was that again?

  • Flawless Fidelius

    Lord Voldemort has devised a way to protect his Horcruxes with the Fidelius Charm while being absolutely certain that the Secret-Keepers will not betray him. Oneshot.