Rose of Thorns (Sonic)

Now now, when I said I was going to make a Sonic Creepypasta I was very confident knowing that most Sonic Creepypassta's really do suck (not offending anybody) but after some persuasions. I decided to make a Parody/Troll pasta, instead of a Creepypasta. Sorry to all the gals that thought this would replace their JeffXBen image collection, so read this as HOW NOT TO CREEPYPASTA!