Sherlock Sexting

It's been months since John's last got off properly (i.e. not just by himself), and he's more than a little frustrated. Sherlock is out of town on a case, but deduces the reason for John's mood and bluntly offers to help via text. Smutty little lemon with some humor (it's Sherlock, after all!) and delightfully explicit without actually being all that naughty, anatomically speaking.