What to do when you have a Dark Lord after you!

Adopted from Maneden. Harry is bored after the war, so deciding to do some cleaning, he discovers one of Ron's old school items. This item will change his life forever, this item gives him the inspiration he needs. Extreme Coarse Language and some sexual themes that according to the ratings guide would make this M rated. Goody. Also some mentions of minor characters. R&R.Lockhart