I'm never too old for this shit!

Have you ever wondered how a middle-aged dude would fare after getting a 'Gamer System' thrown at him? Well, look no further! I'm 48 years old, my best friend's a cowardly dog and I'm spending my best years crawling dungeon for fun! Hah! Eat shit young'uns! I don't need no Gamer Body! I got my fists, and fuck choosing a class!