Bonded

"That'll be a great morning conversation. How am I? Swell-Dolohov's curse is back, let me just grab some bangers and pop over to Pomphrey and settle into my deathbed. Don't forget I look dreadful in black and I'd prefer a bouquet of wildflowers. Scratch that, just set me on fire and send me out to sea in some twisted Viking funeral." (Full summary inside, Two Shot, Completed)