My Immortal: It's So Bad, You'll Be Clawing Your Eyes Out

I'm new to and apparently doing commentaries on bad fanfics is good. So, I decided to bring you a commentary of the worst fanfiction ever made. And if I don't survive, please kill My Immortal's author. Thank you for your generosity. You'll be making the world a better place. Please review! :) PS: In the list of characters, unknown 1 is Ebony.