Snape and Dumbledore hatch a plan to accomplish the one thing they've always wanted to do: Eliminate Harry Potter.
Draco finds himself in a relationship that starts as a joke but escalates into something more. A Drapple fic that attempts to do something more.
Hagrid buys Dumbledore joke beard shampoo and Snape begins to hate him and apples. Implied DumbledoreXHisownbeard I guess.