The disappointments that go hand in hand with assumption.

So I've been studying Shakespeare recently, and out of boredom I decided to re-write 'The Prince's Tale' in the style of the Bard himself. I figure it's not a crossover, because I'm not using any of Shakespeare's characters. So if you're interested, give this a look! I admit that it's not perfect in rhythm and pentameter, but it was worth a shot. Enjoy!

This is an epic tale about friendship, loyalty and liberation. A beautiful masterpiece of a fierce, and loving companionship . This is the story of how Harry Potter gave the Sorting Hat its Hattist Rights.

Harry supects that Snape and Malfoy have a secret, so Dumbledore has no choice but to fire the DADA teacher. Upon leaving the castle Snape gets a job in the Muggle world... with terrible consequences. Set during the HBP- funnier as progresses.

If Lockhart actually manages to solve the secret of The Chamber of Secrets, Harry will have no choice but to kiss Malfoy. Ew. ADDED BONUS: An exploding head. Oneshot, no slash. Shame.

A series of one shots concerning that old 'charmer', Gilderoy Lockhart. NO SLASH... yet. Rated T for 'subtle' sexual references. Please R&R! Do not be confused if character comes back to life after dying in the previous chapter... Lockhart can do that.

Hermione Granger has just been called into Professor Snape's office. Will she return with her perfect school-record intact? Or does the professor have other 'punishments' in mind? Created with two of my best friends in the world... R&R!

Snape is famously not like Marmite. You can love him, hate him, like him, lust for him... the list goes on. For all those out there who DON'T understand why the Potions Master is so adored, please read and be enlightened. For all those who do know, ENJOY.

As devastation is ever impending, the Ministry of Magic are getting desperate. How many students, upon leaving Hogwarts, will become Aurors... or Death Eaters? Surely it would be better to get rid of the lot of them? Wizards are a dying breed after all...

A short one-shot about Ron Weasley... that hardly contains any Ron at all. Sorry to disappoint any hardcore fans. Molly Weasley and Gilderoy Lockhart are having a discussion over Ron's... Progress. A dark-humoured number with a twist. Read and enjoy!

A series of flashbacks from the life of Petunia Evans and how she became the magic-hating muggle she is. To be posted in two parts.