After kidnap, loss of love, death, resurrection,sharing his body with four entities, and sleeping in a coffin for several years, a new Harry walks the earth. VincentValentine!Harry. Not a crossover. Upcoming chapters will be longer.

Short light-hearted parody directed at the many, many fics that send Harry off to the USA after he has a full blown mental breakdown because of evil backstabbers and pages of bashing, etc, etc. Surprisingly, this isn't that offensive at all.

Continued for Quatreastrophe. Harry's twin vanquished Voldemort. Harry believes he is unwanted, unworthy and unneeded, and by accident, Apparates across the globe. Eleven years later, he returns, staff in hand, and war drums in his ears.