Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Probability

Harry's fifth year is off to a bang-up start: It's been four days and they've got a pink, err, thing for a Defense against the Dark Arts teacher. Then someone sends him a baby in the owl post: His baby, according to the goblins. Daphne's running out of time. Hermione's had it up to here with wizards, witches, marriage expectations, goblins, bank letters, and Prof. Umbridge.