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Giraffe Cultist

  • Fifty Shades of Jeffrey the Giraffe

    By Giraffe Cultist • Updated: 3 Dec 2014 • Published: 3 Dec 2014 • 7 Chapters • 4,605 words • 0 followers • Horror/Humor • Rating: M • Completed

    It's finally out! The full and complete origin story of Jeffrey of the Giraffe. Note: Any relation to another character named "Jeffrey the Giraffe" is purely unintentional. Also note that a disturbed 13 year old wrote this, which is why the grammar sucks. DO NOT READ UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES IF YOU ARE: Easily offended by religion, race, rape, politics, or incredibly butthurt.

  • Jesus is Love, Jesus is Life

    By Giraffe Cultist • Updated: 18 Oct 2014 • Published: 18 Oct 2014 • 230 words • 0 followers • Romance/Parody • Rating: M • In Progress

    The story that will anger and disgust a generation of Christian youth.

  • The Tale of the MLG Elite No-Scoper

    By Giraffe Cultist • Updated: 2 Aug 2014 • Published: 2 Aug 2014 • 678 words • 0 followers • Humor/Parody • Rating: T • In Progress

    The true story of the most MLG Elite No-Scoper ever to exist