Dark Humor

Chapter 41

Bottoms Up!

A/N: this is just a drabble that came to mind when I found my plush fox upside down and wedged between the wall and the bed one morning. Don't ask me why it inspired this, because I really have no clue.

It was no secret that Scabior had a drinking problem. Everyone knew it. But when it really became obvious was the day Sanderson found him in his lynx form, upside down and wedged between the mattress and the wall with only his butt and stubby little tail visible above the edge of the mattress.

Sanderson grabbed him by the tail and hauled him out from between the bed and the wall. He held the sleeping animagus for several long seconds, waiting for him to wake up, and when that didn't work he shook the sleeping feline to rouse him from his slumber.

Scabior snorted and opened his eyes, looking around and wondering why the world had suddenly turned upside down. Sanderson dropped him on the bed, where he changed back into his human form and lay still for several minutes before attempting to move.

"Scabior," said Sanderson, frowning at the hungover and disoriented Snatcher. "What were you doing wedged between the bed and the wall with your arse in the air?"

"Was sleeping," Scabior mumbled, rubbing sleep from his eyes as he slowly sat up in bed. "Was taking a kip is all. Do you mind?"

The winged wizard sighed and rolled his eyes. "Yes, I saw that, Scabior. Now would you care to explain how you ended up in such a position?"

Scabior looked back at he space between the bed and the wall where he'd been sleeping. "I thought I was in bed," he said, sounding slightly confused. "Or at least I tried to lay down in bed. I guess I must 'ave missed my target when I collapsed."

"This is ridiculous. Of all the places for you to fall asleep after drinking all night."

"Now don't give me tha. 'Aven't we all fallen out of bed every once in a while, Sanderson?"

"Yes, Scabior. But this is the fourth time this week and it's only Tuesday."