Dark Humor

Chapter 7

Snuggle Bear

Written for Lamia of the Dark's Return of the Daily Weird Prompt Thing

Prompt - "And no one knows where the koala came from, but it seems to really like Sirius."


Severus never did like Sirius. From the day they first met as children at Hogwarts they didn't get along. As time passed, their hatred towards each other grew. Eventually it reached the point where they couldn't stand being in the same room with each other. So needless to say Severus was not pleased when he had to attend meetings with Sirius.

When the members of the Order would gather to discuss the latest goings on, Severus would sit as far away from Sirius as he could. He ignored Sirius, refusing to speak to him unless it was completely necessary

One evening when Luipin came over to join in the meeting, Severus couldn't help but notice how close he and Sirius were. They sat next to each other, conversing with each other more than with the others in the room. And when Arthur announced that the Order had suffered a recent setback in their progress against the Dark Lord, Sirius reached over and held Lupin's hand, comforting the werewolf who was upset by the bad news.

"It's alright, Remus," said Sirius. "We won't let that bastard win. We just need to rethink our strategy and continue fighting back against him."

Sirius then looked over and noticed Severus staring at them from the opposite end of the table.

"And just what the hell are you looking at?" Sirius snapped. "Afraid you might be missing something, Snivellus?"

A frown creased the corners of Snape's mouth as he looked away. He didn't want to get into it with Sirius. Not here, where there were too many witnesses.

"Don't call him that, Sirius," said Lupin. "It's rude. I was in hopes you'd outgrown the childish name calling you used when we were in school."

"Yes, well maybe if he washed his filthy hair once in a while, he might find it easier to attract a mate of his own. Then he wouldn't have to spend all day staring at us, snuggle bear."

Snuggle bear. Now there's a new one. Snape had heard the name snivellus many times. But he'd never heard snuggle bear before.

An idea started to form in his mind. 'Let's see how Sirius likes it when something happens to his beloved snuggle bear,' thought Snape.

As the sun parted ways with the horizon early the next morning, Sirius awoke to find that Lupin was missing. He rolled over in bed, noticing that the spot beside him that Lupin usually occupied was empty.

He sat up in bed and looked around.

"Remus? Where are you?"

Severus sat at the kitchen table, sipping from a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. All was quiet and peaceful, until voices drifting in from upstairs let him know that Sirius was awake.

He waited for a couple minutes, giving Sirius time to search the room and discover the surprise he'd left for him. He finished his cup of coffee, then set his paper aside on the kitchen table and made his way upstairs.

The voices grew louder as he reached the landing on the first floor. He opened the door on his right and this is what he heard.

"...and no one knows where the koala came from, but it seems to really like Sirius."

There was Sirius, sitting on the edge of the bed with a fuzzy koala sitting in his lap. The koala was nuzzling Sirius, affectionately snuggling against his chest as he looked up at him with big, bright eyes.

'Snuggle bear, indeed,' thought Snape, a smirk forming on his lips as he watched the koala nuzzling Sirius.