Nobody ever asked my birthday

Not quite certain

Harry forced himself to not take a gander around Snape's office.

It probably hadn't changed from the last time he'd looked, anyway.

He wasn't sure if Snape had the place warded to hell and back, or had decided he simply didn't care if Harry rearranged everything.

Harry knew better than to do that. If only because it would earn him another double detention - one to fix the mess and the other for making it.

His stomach twisted, as he eyed the hard wooden chair in front of Snape's desk. It was designed to make a child look repentant - if only so that the child would actually be allowed to leave. It was that uncomfortable. Penitence was easier when you were already feeling pain.

Harry didn't sit. He would, if Snape told him to, but at this moment -

Snape had the look of a man who paced, often, while thinking out plans and thoughts.

Harry started to pace, not to plan, but simply to express the abundance of energy that wanted to overflow from his veins. At least it wasn't magical energy - that would be the worst thing, to have exploded Snape's office.

He'd managed to be at least briefly optimistic, until a quick Tempus charm told him that Potions class was nearly over.

How long was Snape planning on making me wait?

Harry wasn't sure if he was merely being saved until Neville was done blowing up his potion (again), or if Snape was trying (possibly unsuccessfully) to let his temper cool off. That last was a disquieting thought. Harry'd worked hard for this plan, and if it hadn't even worked, Harry wasn't completely sure how he could explain himself.

Harry looked at the time again, and then again. Then he started seeing how quickly he could cast the spell, until the afterimage of one lingered onto the start of the next. It was almost distracting enough.

Except that class was now over.

Feeling an upwelling of dread from his stomach (it tasted like bile), Harry pressed his ear to the door.

"Sir, Harry's got to eat lunch, it's not healthy for him, and I think he skipped most of breakfast too." Hermione Granger said. So typical, Harry thought, almost letting himself grin at her constant worrying.

"Miss Granger, your arrogance astounds. Truly, to tell a Head of House for over a dozen years, that he needs to make certain magical children are well fed." Snape said, in a cold sort of way that Harry knew didn't bode well.

Hermione, as usual, tried to stammer out some sort of apology. Harry quickly backed away from the door, darting over to the wooden chair just as Snape entered the room.

It was that extra dose of panic that did it, Harry would think later. He actually managed to overtopple the chair - sideways, landing himself on his arm.

"Mister Potter!" Snape said, in a voice that held more reproach than alarm.

Harry scrambled to his feet and sat on the now wobbly chair. That did nothing to help the uncomfortableness, of course.

"Even Mister Longbottom knows how to sit a chair properly, most days." Snape said snidely.

Harry bit back any of a dozen retorts.

Snape strode up to Harry, from behind. "What part of 'I will not brook any disruption to my Potions class' was so difficult to understand?" He said this in such an unctuous voice that it made Harry's skin crawl.

"It was perfectly clear, sir." Harry said, sounding repentant, because he was repentant.

"I hardly thought I needed to state that inviting the two-headed dragon of destruction that is the Weasley twins was out of bounds." Snape said, his tone deceptively mild.

"Yes, sir." Harry said, suppressing a smirk. I'll just bet you didn't think of that one!

"Potter, I didn't presume it possible for a child clad in red and gold to dupe one of my own house into being an unwitting accomplice." Snape said, and Harry wasn't quite sure if that sneer was for Draco or for Potter.

"Yes, sir." Harry said, his eyes still staring forward.

"And an assault on my personage and dignity?" Snape said, lifting an eyebrow. "What do you think the appropriate punishment is for all that, in the span of one single class?"

"How about a thank you?" Harry Potter said, at last turning his head to look up at Snape. Harry wasn't certain that the sweet had worked, but he figured if it hadn't, Snape wouldn't be listening - or talking to him.

"...And?" Snape said.

Harry Potter thought, and then started to think out loud, "The twins will have their own punishment, of course, but I take that as a week's worth of detentions - there's no guaranteeing that they haven't started another scheme in motion, and they'll be selling their products regardless... For the interruption itself, I think that's worth a month of detentions. For recruiting Draco Malfoy, I don't believe that deserves a punishment - for me at least. As for the 'assault on your personage and dignity'? I think that's another month of detentions, sir." Harry said, trying to be fair - or at least as fair as Snape would be.

"With that many detentions, you will develop quite a hand at ingredient preparation." Snape said, "You will, of course, serve these detentions with me."

It was at that point, that Snape's belly started to grumble. Harry caught Snape's irritated look - now cast at his own belly, for interrupting. "For now, let's eat!"

It looked as if by magic, but several dozen parchments moved invisibly out of the way on Snape's desk, and a full lunch of beer and cheese soup, sided by grilled cheese, and also half a steaming hot baguette, appeared in an instant.

Several moments later, another serving appeared, on Harry's side of the desk.

They both dove into their food; Harry couldn't help grinning up at Snape, who lowly muttered, 'of all the ridiculous, positively Gryffindor ways to apologize to do...'

Hmph. And here I'd been thinking it was quite Slytherin.

[a/n: Snape's not one for longwinded thank yous. Leave a review, folks?

Snape is well aware of the patience it took to enact Harry's plan.

And that it was probably one of the only ways Harry could apologize.

This may account for some lenience for the Chaos in the Classroom.]